Kon: Trainin' with Blue beetle

She told Supergirl she doesn’t want her as a friend anymore, and just told her to leave her alone forever. Gah! I have to live around Kara, and my girlfriend pulls a bad move like this. Oh yeah dinner at the Kents is gonna be real fun.

Any way I was flying by were Titans Tower used to be and saw Beetle just sitting there staring at the hole. I get him and take him to the Batcave blindfolded because I ain't sure Jaime knows about Batman's other identity.

And of course when we get there Robin is crabby. “You brought him here, But what about..."

" He was blindfolded dude. Don’t get your Bat panties in a bunch. "

He makes a growling noise. " Conner Batman is not going to like this. Besides you can't talk about panties Captain Codpiece."

" I had a codpiece in one costume get over it dude. Wait why did you even look there?"


“You looked like you wore a big red diaper we all laughed at you."


“Which is why I wear the jeans now." I shrug " We've all had bad costume choices so really none of us can talk."

“My costume is cool." Miss Martian smiles.

" Anyway Conner " Robin starts at me again. " You need to think before you act."

“Like you?" I ask.

“Exactly."

" And ya don't think that maybe telling a girl that wants to break up with you that you two have to stay together to stop the bad future from coming is thinking a bit too much?"

His eyes go wide. " Cass told you that?"

“Yup."

He turns read and storms off. " Wait don't go I dunno how to Turn Bats' trainer on!" I shout but he's already out.

“Well this doesn't look very complicated." I say to myself. As I look at the computer.

Beetle gives me this odd look. “Are you sure you know what you're doing Kon?"

“Hey ya need trainin' am I right? Well this turns on the holo-training thing Bats has. I... think."

Miss Martian interrupts. “I um don't think that's the trainer. "

“Of course it is." I start pushing buttons. This noise goes all through the cave but not from the holo-trainer. All the suddent this thing that looks like a big metal donut starts glowing at the center and these things start jumping out of it.

A bunch land on my face.

" Aaah! What are they?"


“I don't know but they all just keep coming." Beetle shouts. “They’re all over the place!"

“They’re sooo cute can I keep them?" Megan squeals.

" I just hope Bats don't know about this.!" I answer. As if on cue he comes outta the a door with these weird things all over him. he pushes me out of the way and turns off the metal donut. “Do not touch the dimensional portal! Now gather up all of these rodents, so we can send them back to where they came from. "


" But... There’s gotta be a least a hundred of 'em." I protest. .

“Then you better get started. or did you forget you're Superboy? Also Beetle Martian girl help him."

“We didn't do it. "Beetle whines.

“And you didn't stop him." Batman answers. And he leaves the room after shaking off all the creatures.

Sigh looks like I better get started.


Meanwhile Van-El stares at a modern art Statue in West City Park. “Man it looks like. " It looks like a robot made out of scrap metal, man when is Vella gettin' here?"


" of course a philistine like you wouldn't be able to appreciate the artist expression of his pain. " a voice behind Van states.


“Dude mind you're own.... Match!

“Yes" he lands a devatating right hook that sends Van across the park.

“I heard, cough cough! That You were turned into a Bizarro!" Van spits out.

Match smiles. “My stupid days are a thing of the past,now I think there are three too many Superboy clones, And in the end there will be only one me.

Superboy's clone: Dating

Cassie called me the other day and asked Vella and I would like to double date with her and Kon. “You know... What do I call you anyway? Well any way Conner doesn't like you much. "

I shrug Yeah he's been a jerk about the name thing he promised to be Superboy red then turns around and calls him self Kon-El, When I call my self Superboy he runs around yellin' he's the one and only Superboy."

“Well don't worry about it we'll get you two talking SB, Conner's just mad at Cadmus and taking it out on you. But we'll get it though his thick head you're like brothers or something. "

“Okay thanks Cass. " Next second I feel my powers go out, and I start coughing like crazy. What the hell is going on it's getting worse. Well I met Vel, and Cassie where they asked me to meet them, The Metropolis Arena. It's some kind of Metahuman Wrestling federation. Vella and Cassie were sitting in the front row.

Kon was no where to be seen. I tried to talk to Vel, but she was way into the wrestling maybe a little too much. What little I remember of saiyans before my ... I mean Kon's death is that they love fighting. Apparently even fake fighting.


That and Vella, and Cassie kept whispering to each other about how hot some of the wrestlers were. Yeah this is what you wanna hear on a date. Then all the sudden some dude who has a skull face.

He keeps yelling about how the Television Champion is a wimp, and will not put up his championship. All the sudden the Teen Titans theme song comes up over the speakers then it changes to Some song about how Evolution is a mystery, and lines in the sand.

" Uh -oh he changed his the theme song Tim's not going to like that. " Cassie moaned.

Vella shrugged. “Does he even care? It's not like Kon hasn't done worse."

" Kon?" I ask and yup it's him running out into the wrestling ring and playing to the crowd.

He wrestled the match pretty well, I mean very well, and when I fought him a while back he fought very differently he had skills, not just punching and kicking, I bet all that training from Robin every time he gets in trouble has actually made him a pretty good fighter.

After he won the match, we all go back stage Kon and Skull guy are acting friendly. Not like in the ring. " Yeah and when ya get this belt We'll have a big rivalry goin' put some butts in the seats It's gonna be awesome."

Cassie interrupts him." You were great out there, babe. ready for dinner."

" Yup. Hey Vella what're you doing here?" He looks over at me. “Oh great."

Dinner was strained the girls were chatting about stuff while Kon Glared at me . Finally I shout. “Hey! It’s not my fault I was cloned!"

“Yeah whatever pal But Vella? I know what' you're thinkin' of doing with her, And If you hurt her in anyway, there can be only one got me?"

“What ya gotta thing for her?" I ask.

“Nope she's my friend, and I don't want you hurtin' her is all. Meh I'm not hungry anymore let's go Cassie."

Well the rest of the night, Me and Vella played at an arcade in the mall and wandered around it until they closed. Then I took her back to the Legacy house.

“Want to come come in?"

“Are ya sure that's a good idea?" I ask.

“Yes, I really like you."

Well I have to say what happened next was great, I mean she was really wild, but she seemed to know what she was doing Which I was lead to believe she wouldn't. Then she mumbled something In her sleep that made it all too clear a name "Jason."

She's been with Jason Todd? I as fallin' for her and that Bastard just had to change his mind, and Go after her when she was interested in me. I'm going to put him in the grave again. Screw what Batman thinks. He lets this mad dog run around without a leash, Well he's about to be put down.

I get up, and leave Vella's Room I see what I think it’s Vegeta, I'm cared for a second, and what the hell is he doing here? Then I notice the dude is younger, and taller, he grabs me by the throat.

“What the Hell did you do with my sister Kon?" Sister? She has a brother the same age as her?

" I'm not Kon..." I barley squeak out before he starts hitting me, them my, or I mean Kon's ex Cassandra Cain, The Spoiler, some kid that looks like a young Tony Stark, Slobo. and Bart's clone Inertia, all pull this kid offa me.

“Vincent no!" Batgirl orders.

“But Cass he..."

“No!" I know that Cass Cain stare way to well. I leave so they can all settle down . Besides I gotta psycho former Robin to beat down.

100 Posts!

That's right the last post on my blog was the 100th. Though it was one of Kon's. Like a lot of posts on this blog, well he tends to have more time on his hands. Actually he's kind of lazy.

I told many of my friends and family the news and this is their response.


Lois: “That’s great, dear. Now help me get Chris off the ceiling."

Chris: "Sugar Puffs together with Mountain Dew are awesome yay! I'm going to give some to Damien!"

Batman: “Clark I really don't... Why is Damien all jittery?"

Kon-El: "Sweet are we gonna have a party? I'll bring the al... I mean soda. "

The Superboy clone of Conner :"Sweet are we gonna have a party? I'll bring the al... I mean soda. "

Supergirl: " I'll care about that when I figure out what my origin is! Was my dad a mad scientist that was obsessed with space phantoms? Did I kill my mother? Or was Dad some kind of Kryptonian park ranger who was nice and my mom a scientists?
Did I actually kill a whole bunch of my class mates? Or was I the popular girl in the schools? I don't know!"

Powergirl: “I know how you feel Kara. Oh and that's nice about the blob thing Superman."

Me: " Blog."

Powergirl: "Whatever."

Hal Jordan:"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Oh wait you're serious? Jeez I guess life really is over after you're married. I mean, Um good job!"

John Stewart: "Superman you have time to blog?"

Hawkman: "Raaar! " (Begins breaking things for some reason.)

Aquaman: " The power to talk to fish is very useful! I am not a poor man's Namor! Love me !Respect me!"

Me: (Backs away slowly.)

Vegeta: "Hmph Whatever Kal-El. I'm close to 500 posts, underachiever."

Son Goku: “I’m hungry."

Ma: “Congratulations Clark! Now if you can help May parker Get Spider-man out of her house, and help him get him a job that would be great."

Pa:" What's a blog? Never mind that Clark. There are fields that need plowing I can't stand here jawin' all day. Unless you want to help that would be great. "

Me: "Already done Pa!"

Pa: "Now about my tractor..."


Well that's it I would have put more but it looks like Pa is going to have me do chores all day. Sigh it's like I'm sixteen again.

Kon: The one and only Superboy

So I was sitting in my room at Kent Farm. When Cassie sorta barges in. “Aren’t you looking for Justice?"

" Her Dad says She's on Draclon or Dracclcon. Well some planet with the name Dracula in it. "


“Halloweeny." I respond. “So what's up with you? Didja miss me? Or is it something else?"

“You know I have telling when you lie down to a science by now."

“Huh?" What did I do this time? Okay I put superglue onto Jericho’s chair... And I changed Beastboy's shampoo with blue hair dye, but they won't leave my Maxims alone. Besides that I can't think of anything I've done lately.

“You acted all okay with that clone of yourself, and your obviously not.”

“How would you be if people you thought were friends made didn't trust you, and made a whole new you?"

"And you should tell them that instead of sulking in here. It's not the clone's fault. "

" Yeah yeah whatever. I'm goin' but not to Cadmus."

“Then where are you going?"

“To blow off a little steam.”

I fly around Metropolis until finally I find Loophole and a gang of losers robbin' a bank.

Loophole is this guy that invented a wrist thingie that lets him walk through walls like Kitty Pryde. Unlike Kitty Pryde, he's not very good at it, and he's ugly not a hot babe.


" Well if it ain't my ol' buddy ." I grin. “We both know about how this will go you'll be lame I'll be awesome and you'll go back to jail so surrender 'kay?"

" Superboy my old enemy!"

“Well your not really part of my rouge's gallery. Your kinda an annoyance I inherited from Superman."

“That is if you’re the real Superboy, “Loop hole laughs. “There have been rumors you aren't.”

I shrug “At least there ain't a cyborg, a dude with weird glasses, an armored version, and a toddler all claimin' to be me."

I knock out all his thugs and he tries to escape. He phases through this statue I heat vision the thingy and he ends up stuck in it. The statue was of some dead superhero from world war two a girl super hero.


His head was solidified on top of the statue the rest of him was of him was stuck inside. " Geez Loopie ya could have waited until later to get in touch with your feminine side."

“Bad jokes, and delight in humiliating me ... it is you isn't it?" He spits.

“Yup Kon-El the one and only Superboy. Accept no substitutes. Legal limits apply not available in all states, your experience may vary, do not feed after midnight."

“Shut up! Shut up! Just take me back to prison to now! At least there I can get away from you."

" You may want me to TTK you outta the statue ya really don't want me to turn you in lookin' like that I mean you don't want that kinda popularity in the joint, ya get what I'm sayin?"

“Sigh. I hate you." He groans.

After takin' him to the police station I see on the news that my clone has been beaten by the Hobgoblin. The Hobgoblin? A dude that ripped off the Green Goblin beating someone wearing the S? He should be ashamed I think I'll go and take down Hobby to show everyone who's the real steel deal.

Great Krypton! Two Conners.

Ever since Conner has come back from the dead he has been acting more like he did when he first escaped Cadmus. I too have come back from the dead I know how traumatic it can be.

His behavior has been getting on my nerves though. So when I hear him arguing with someone I was a little bit irked . I fixed the broken bridge I was working on, and fly right to him.

I find he was fighting another him. So either Match is doing one of his monthly “pretend to be Conner “plans. Which he hasn't done that often since he became a Bizarro.


I separate the two of them, and after doing some tests we find that the new Kon was what he said he was a new clone created from Kon's old body with his memories up to the time he died implanted. Just to be sure I checked his grave and the body was gone, though that could have been because the original Superboy was wished back.

(Okay I know I'm the original Superboy but whatever.)

While I leave the Conner’s arguing and giving batman and Robin headaches I go to find Project Cadmus. If I had known they were going to pull something like this, I would have looked for them long ago.

Finally I find them underneath Metropolis so they really haven't moved that far.

Director Cannon offers his hand “Nice to see you again Superman but I can guess at the reason for your visit."

“You cloned Superboy. I want to know why."

“Because he's been dead this way he can live again."

I glare. "He's been back for sometime."

He shook his head “Superman, I know you wanted him to be back, but that kid is an imposter you have to know that."

“No he isn't. It has been confirmed by many people I trust with my life."

'He sighs. “You have to be suspicious of how he said he returned magic marbles that summon a dragon. Come on."

Actually Conner never claimed that. It was Vegeta's oldest daughter that claimed that. But I'm not telling him that. “There is more in Heaven and Earth than is dreamt of in your philosophy."

Dr Serling Rouqette a former girlfriend of Kon's pipes in." Some of the things this Superboy has done, the real one wouldn't do."

“I’m sorry miss, but I knew him better than you, this Kon-El is the same Kon-El. He's just acting immature lately."

Director Cannon shakes his head. “I wish it hadn't taken so long to figure out what Lex Luthor did to create him in the first place. We had his body ever since the Infinite Crisis.

So we took his memories from the brain, but re cloning his body has been a bitch Each clone became a Bizarro, Until now."

“And what's different this time?" I ask.

Dr. Roquette smiles “Trade secret."

"Hm." I answer I don't like the fact they are hiding it. Could Luthor be back in bed with Cadmus? I leave and return to Bruce's manor. I find the two Conners in good spirits .Actually getting along.

"Man this is great! Like havin' a twin." One of them in the black t-shirt says.

" So you two have made up." I state.

“Yeah." the one in the Blue and red costume laughs. "We figured out how to do this get ready for Superboy Blue!"


And the one in T-shirt shrugs "I'll just stick with Kon-El."

" So your the one that's been back in the last year or so?"


“Yeah and if he screws around on Cassie again I'm gonna smack him." Superboy Blue states. Rao I did not want to be reminded of the whole Superman Red, Superman Blue fiasco.

“Well I'm glad you two have figured this out your not both going to be on the Titans are you?"

" Nope.I'm stayin' on the Titans." Kon shrugs.

Vella who's been staying around along with Spoiler, I'm not really sure what they're involment is in all of this. Asks the one in blue out. It takes all my super strength not to laugh at the thought of the look on Vegeta's face if he could see that.

Superboy Blue Grins. “I dunno. I mean the last thing I remember was bein' with Cass, But ya know then he starts using his X-ray vision on her until I smack him. "OW! Okay sure why not?"

She squeals and runs out saying she was going to tell someone. Superboy Blue grins. " Well things are lookin' up ,but I guess now I have to find a place to live I guess I could stay on With Cadmus as a field agent."


Stephanie grins “You Know we could take on our team."

" Nah. I don't wanna be on any teams right now. But thanks for the offer though." Then he starts coughing. "Man I can't believe how dusty this place is."

Spoiler gives me an odd look. As the clone leaves. " Dust? In a place that has Alfred working in it?"

So how was my Christmas?

Not bad. It doesn't matter why I received What I enjoyed is the reactions of my friends, and family.


Kara: That necklace she's been hinting about.

Chris: Those Hot Wheels race tracks, and some transformers.

Conner: Speakers for his car though I don't know why, he has super hearing, and really shouldn't be carrying around that Wrestling Championship belt at the breakfast table.

Bruce: I enhanced his training room with Kryptonian technology.

Diana: alien battle armor.

Ma And Pa: A formula that gave them my powers for a day.

Lois: A night alone In New York City.

I hope every one else had a Happy Holiday.

Kon: Livin' with the Legacy

So our giant "T" has been stolen. I still say it was some tea makin' company. But oh well no one listens to me. Especially when I said I could just spend the night at the Kent Farm not everyone interrupts me.

So we all go there in the Jet that somehow didn't get jakked. I took a nap in the back and got this weird dream, It as me wearing this black ring. But my face was zombie lookin' and I said " The Blackest Night is coming and I want my Soul!"

“AAAAH!"

“Oh get off it Conner.” Robin sighs, "It's not that bad. Just stay out of Vincent's way."

Raven gave me an odd look. “Some dreams can be prophetic young Conner." And then we go into the Legacy House. It didn't start off well First Inertia Hand Beast boy had a wrestling match over the remote.

Maybe I should ask to work part time at the federation I work at? Nah. Inertia and Beast boy both would drool over the divas. I gotta work with these people. Any way it was quiet for a while after that I was eating a sandwich in the kitchen When Cass (Cain) and Vince walked in from different doors. They both stared at each other.

“Um hey... Cass how's it going?"

"Good."

" So we're taking it slow so I'll um go." Vincent stutters.

" No. you.. Don’t.. Have to... um..." Then they started making out. Man! I'm tryin' to eat here! When clothes started gettin' torn I ran outta there.

I hid in the room they gave me for a while. But it's the Question's old room, and it creepy. That and I used some kinda hair gel, and when I accidentally stepped on a canister and gas came out of it my hair changed color. I now have brown hair arggh!

Hoping that's gonna were off. I run to one of the showers, and I see a blonde female form. Cool I think I can surprise Cassie (Sandsmark.) I open the curtain, and “Stephanie!" I shout.



“AAAAAAAHHHHHH!" Was her response Then she started throwing towels at me .

"Sorry! Sorry!" I yell running. Back to Question's creepy room it is then.

About fifteen minutes later. I hear a knock on the door and a angry heartbeat I know it's Tim right off.

“Before ya break out the Green K Rob, let just say it was an accident!"

“You saw Steph Naked!” He kicks down the door.

" I know it was a mistake."

" I haven't see her naked and you have?" He hollers.

" Ya really should. " I say. “Wait that came out wrong. Besides that's the same as you dating Cassie while I was dead."

His face goes red. “How’s that the same?"

"Well it's similar."

Then Rob wanders off mumbling about gettin' even. Oh Man this is gonna be a bad night.

Kon: Search for Spoiler

I was woke up with the screaming of “Titans Together!" And Of course I say my first thing dumb thing of the morning. “Not now Jessica Simpson." Cassie smacks me in the head.

“What? I'm up. What?"

She rolls her eyes “Let’s just go."

Seems Robin and Rose got some kind of feeling that Spoiler was kidnapped by Deathstroke. Rose I kind sort of see since she has a bit of precog ability, but since when did Tim go all "Deadzone" on us?

" We have to go to Bludhaven." Rob said.

" Hey since we're doin' the whole psychic thing we can make a killin' at the lottery. " I joke, Cass elbows me in the gut.

“This isn't the time for fun Conner God knows what Slade is doing to Stephanie. "

I pat him on the shoulder. “Don’t worry bud we'll get her back and put Slade in traction for a while. No offense Rose, and Joey."

Rose snorts "As long as I get to put him in traction, I don't care. "

So we all load up into the jet and fly to Bludhaven. Oh joy Bludhaven again. Huh. Truns out Robin was right since there was like big green glowing giant monkeys fighting with Super villains.

We find Batgirl wrestling with Slade And I think Slade was a little too happy about that if ya know what I mean. The Titans join the battle with the Legacy guys and gals. Seems so weird them bein' in a fight without Question , and Saiyaman hovering around.

Vincent knocks Mammoth off of himself and glares at me. “You!"

“Hey Vincent pal this ain't the time...” His fist interrupts me my mouth.

Wondergirl shouts at Batgirl. “Get your pet off of my boyfriend! We're on the same side here. "

Batgirl Kind of mutters like usual. “Vincent.. Is as.. Human as Kon. Besides.. I can't stop him when he gets like this."

“Yeah right!" Wonder girl growls knocking out Titania’s. “You know I'm still a little mad at that affair you had with Conner."

Deathstroke smiles under his mask. “Seems you little heroes can't get along."

What was weirdest was Spoiler was fighting Robin, and hitting on anything that moved man she must be on that serum.

While me and Vincent were wrestling in the sky she yells “Yeah baby! Now rip each others shirts off!"

Tim Shouts Steph this isn't you!"

“Aw don't be jealous Boy Wonderful there's plenty of me to go around.”

I must admit I was distracted by that I mean gross. And I get Vince's knee in my gut. " Now feel my true power bastard." He laughs. He then turns into this



Next thing I know the dude is mega strong and throwing me through what's left of buildings like I was a rag doll. I Blast him with Heat Vision and I freeze breathe him.

When he breaks out of the ice I feel that power surge again and a massive TK blast knocks him away. I smile. " Touchdown."

He gets up and I dropkick the saiyan he flies several feet and when he gets to his he gets a Superboy special DDT. When I do the DX chop, he punches me in the groin.

“Clone idiot!" Vince sneers. “You deserve all this pain and more for that robot!"


I Huff. " Ya really love Cass Cain Don't cha?"

He makes this noise like pfft!" Which is Vegetaese for " He knows I feel things! Quick act like a dick!"

The Parasite grabs onto both of us. Where the heck did he come from? He saps out some of our energy, and then something happens and it explodes out of him leaving ol' Rudy ko'd.

" Heh. Looks like our energies ain't compatible." I smile.

" I could have told you that. " Vincent growls. “Now we've wasted enough time here eat this bean, and we'll help save Spoiler.”

“What are we good now?" I ask.

“Yes I hurt you. You hurt me just don't make no more Batgirl love bots and we'll be fine. "

“Beleive me I ain't doing that anymore."

" Good. Eat the bean it'll heal you. "

He wasn't lying I wonder where he gets these things. Ah well never mind back to the bad guy fightin'."

......

I usually don't care about the toys that are made with my likeness.Usually as long as they do not have lead paint on them They don't cross my mind. Some of them are okay. Others are a little strange. Then there are a few that are so horrific. That I have to do a double take when I see them and this is one of them.



He looks like he was attacked by a makeup monster and enjoyed it, Or he's getting in touch with his feminine side. Or more accurately his cheap hooker side. Who the heck authorized this?


Something tells me this might be some kind of plot by an enemy of mine to make me look foolish likely the Prankster or the Toy Man. Either way I'm making a bonfire for all of these I find.

Ah!

Okay I know the whole Cass bot was a bad idea, I get it. But in my defense I did go days without sleep before thinkin' of it. And Cassandra Cain is pretty much the only one who isn't pissed about it.

HS thinks his punishment is bad. Washing windows at SHIELD HQ? Pfft! I had to clean the Intergalactic Zoo in Superman's fortress you do not wanna see the droppings of the metal eatin' monster believe me. And I gotta keep dodgin' the Starro, and The Black Mercy.

Also I gotta clean the bottle city of Kandor. Not the bottle the damned city itself. And Of course I'm shrunk down in it with no powers. Oh and finally the most fun of all Training with Batman.

Well not really trainin' per say it's just an excuse for Bats to wail on me for an hour in a red sun room. And since he read my blog comments and saw me dissin' him well he's added Adamantinum gloves for extra fun.

So Now that I was finally able to go back to the tower, and just deal with the lesser of two evils Robin, well I wasn't expecting him to Poke me with a broom or bake a lasagna just to throw at me. Robin and his danged tasty tasty revenge.

I wish I hadn't laughed when he said he was a virgin though. I mean that was mean. Even though I can't figure out how that happened. I mean the bat family, have girls all over them. Look At Bats last week at this Christmas charity event.



Then there's chicks like Tarantula, and Talia who just take what they want from Bats and Nightwing. Even Jason Todd has Vella running around after him. Let me restate Red Hood, Who dressed like an evil tootsie roll pop, has a girl stalking him.

When I was talking to Kara bout this, she rolled her eyes. "You know Conner tim Thinks before he leaps unlike you if you weren’t half Kryptonian I don't doubt you'd have a thousand STDs now."

I glare. " Your one to talk. "

" Hey when your evil father uses you as a weapon you can talk Kon."

" Um hello? Lex? "

She shakes her head. "Rao! We are screwed up. But hey, I learned from my mistakes you just seem to keep making the same ones over and over. Also Tim is just waiting for the right one nothing wrong with that. Unlike you who has to keep hurting miss right for whatever reason."


I ain't tryin' to hurt Wondergirl it's just that... "

I'm interrupted by this blonde dude who says. "Excuse me?"

"Hey rude Starbucks customer guy leave me.. Wait do I know you?"

"Yes. It's been a long time Kid. Glad you got rid of the bowl haircut. Though I miss the leather jacket. "

" It wasn't a bowl Ben, it was a fade and it was better than that hoodie you used to wear, Though I must admit your Spidey costume was awesome. So your back from the dead too huh?"

" Yeah, and of all people I have Booster Gold to thank for that. I'll tell you about it sometime. though I'm here now for a bit of a recruitment drive."

Supergirl makes a coughing sound. "Want to introduce me Conner?"

“Yeah sure this is Ben Reilly, Aka The Scarlet Spider. Another clone, though he's A Spidey clone so he's a bit hated and all that and he owes me a rematch for the fight he cheated in when he beat me."

" I did not cheat Kid you blundered on your own." He protests.

"Okay so recruitment for a job? Me?"

Ben sighs. "No. I wanted to have you along but the boss wanted your cousin. "

"Oh and who's the Boss?" He's outside. We go to see him and why am I not surprised?




" I told you not to bring him into this Scarlet Spider!"

" Outta What?" I ask. " let me guess this something Superman wouldn't like isn't it?"


"Hh." he responds " Most likely, although it needs to done. Clark will just have to deal with it."

" And what's it?" I ask again.

" I had considered you Conner. You have Impressed me with some things like defeating Vincent at the tournament. Capturing Black Zero, and several other villains, though your blatant immaturity has outweighed that. The constant womanizing, the putting up billboards that spread lies about Robin. The dancing with Stephanie while you had a noble goal, you went about it the wrong way putting Robin in an emotinal crisis.and finally, The Batgirl love bot. You've proven to me that you aren't ready to graduate from the Titans yet, in fact you may need to be demoted to the Power Pack so you can be around others of your own emotional level. Kara you on the other hand have impressed me. You are ready."


" What 're you quittin' the JLA Again?" I query.

"No. I am staying in the JLA the less you know about what I’m doing the better. Conner. Kara? What is your answer?"

"Tell me what your offering Bruce and we'll talk ." She smiles.

" Fine meet me at the Batcave." he starts walking over to the Batwing With Ben in tow."

"So what does Tim think about you recruiting from his team eh?" I yell.

"He doesn't know, and when he does he'll just have to deal with it."

Damn. Looks like Bats is in full jerk mode again.

Arena of stupid

Somehow me and Batman were taken to some place between realities to battle other versions of ourselves. While we waited to battle he complained the whole time to me about Conner.

"What he did was irresponsible,and borderline psychotic. Building a love bot is something Lex Luthor would do not Superman."

I roll my eyes. " He's not Lex. He just doesn't think before he acts a lot of times. He's being punished so stop worrying about it. "

" Perhaps you should try to figure out why he keeps acting out." Batman growls. " Hell Kara is now beginning to act more normal ."

I took a little offense at that. Sure Supergirl had a rough time fitting in when she first came to the planet. But she's gotten past her issues, and is doing quite well now days.

" So. How's Jason doing these days?" I ask.

" That's a low blow Clark."

Before I can respond, It's my turn to fight. All the alternate versions of me I fought were strange .. to say the least.





I never thought I would miss fighting Ultraman, Nazi Superman, Or Soviet Superman. I wish I knew what the point of fighting these other "Supermen" is.

Kon: Misadaventures in Ghost busting finale

HS tried to talk me outta my brilliant idea. " Kon girls are sensitive about that kind of thing dude Cass will think it's a violation. And Shiara.... "

" Dude Cass Don't even know what the word violation means. Things that would bother most chicks don't even register to her. Besides I got 'er permission before doin' this she said and I quote As... long.. as I don't have... to touch Zero . Also with Shiara you are whipped buddy. "

" She's okay with a robot that looks like her doing it with a dead guy?"


" Yup ." I shrugged.

He eyes me suspiciously. " Did she understand what you were saying?"

" Uh huh. And once again she said as long as she didn't have to do it."

" Have you ever thought about how Zero is gonna accomplish this? I mean he's intangible. "

Ya know I did but with all the time I've been havin' not bein' able to sleep. I kinda forgot what I came up with. I look over to some Robin robot that Supergirl built so she can destroy it every time he gave her an order she didn't like.

" He can use the Robin bot, Ya know possess it. "

HS slaps his face. " That's wrong in so many ways." I keep thinking there was something Supes told me not put in the robots I build but I can't remember what.Damn exhaustion.

Any way the with the bot I fly to Titans' Tower. I convince Zero to possess the Robin bot. And we HS,and Cass bot in San Fransisco. Zero/ Robin Bot puts lame moves on on the Cass bot.

It didn't matter she liked it.
They apparently made a spectacle of themselves. There were people yelling " I thought those two were... eeeeew!" I guess they don't know the real Batgirl, and Robin ain't really kin just both adopted by Bats.

Never really got why Rob never went for it. Instead he fixes her up with antisocial half saiyan. If it was fear of Batman, or if he really thought of her as a sister. That or she ain't interested either way no reason to punish her with with fixing her up with That Vincent loser.



Me and HS go back to Titan's Tower , and start playing the new Smackdown VS Raw game. My Kon character was beating HS' character when Wonder Girl Rushes in. " Okay Conner what did you do?"

" I know ya've been made Titan's Leader until Rob comes back but..."


She glares." That's the problem I know for certain Robin and Batgirl are both in Gotham. And yet they are on television, making a porno on the San Fransisco roof tops, It's all over the news right now! And I know you Conner. You have something to do with it. "

" Okay I made a Cass Bot and Zero is in side the Robin Bot. "

" Great Hera Conner! That's so sick! HS Why did you let him do this?"

" I tried to talk him out of it." HS complains.

Cassie, changes the channel to show us the grossness I don't wanna see that. But for some reason That Future Kid that had threatened Black Zero sometime back was there. He pulls Robin bot off of Cass Bot and sneers.

" A robot, eh? I don't know who it is that's decided to lure me out with this insult. But I will do to them what I do to you!" He rips the Robin Bot in two. And the Zero Ghost stands there.

" Hey Mister that's my girlfriend, and you interrupted a tender moment. "

Cain stares. " Huh. Mother never mentioned you. She mentioned some guy that was called Black Wind she had a crush on Kon-El, my father and a couple of others but not you. Why do you suppose that it is spirit?"

" She was too hurt after my death?" He stutters.

" I doubt that. " Cain snorts. " Anyway that is not my mother , but a mockery it has no life force. But as for you Dragon Flame!"

The ghost sets on fire. Cain sneers. " It's magic fire it can even hurt you there is only one way to stop it. Move on to the next plane of existence! Reincarnate go to Heaven or Hell or whatever I don't care! Just leave this world!"

The ghost vanishes then Cain looks at the Cass Cain Bot. Who whines "I liked that Why did you stop it?"

This just makes the saiyan growl. " One of the few people who didn't treat me like some kind of beast, and your very existence mocks her. I will not have it!"

Then I remember what that part was I wasn't supposed to put in was. It gave the Cass Cain Bot superhuman strength This just pissed off the hybrid dude. Who became a supersaiyan.

He blasted the robot with something called a " Big Bang Attack." Then he stares at the news camera. " Whoever is responsible for this I will find you ! And you will feel my wrath!"


Me and HS Both do that gulping thing you do when when your scared. The look in his eyes was freaky. Insane freaky.

Wonder girl sighs. " Perfect you two ticked off a psychopath. "

" Me?" HS shouts. " I didn't do anything!"

" Hey there's no way Bruce can trace it back to us. We got away Scott free. " I reassure. Until we hear this " Ahem." behind us. We turn and see our dads!

Shit.

Kon: misadventures in ghost busting part 2

Ya know Bludhaven wasn't that awesome when it was still built up. It was like Gotham's ugly sister. Now it's a big hole in the ground, with the stench of Chemo Everywhere.

I was pulling out bodies and burying them at super speed , With HS continually going " Nope! No."

Then pieces of Chemo attacked me . They just jumped off the bodies And engulfed me. HS burned them off.

" Kon Are you alright?"

" No! it's horrible!" I shout.

" What are you hurt? "

" No it ruined my favorite shirt!"


" Conner be serious." HS moans.


Well it's kinda hard to do dude with this needle in the haystack thing we're doin'. No way we can find Zero's body to bury it in hey... wait a second."


" What is it Conner? You got something?"

" Yeah I think so, If Cass' old apartment is still there I think we'll find loser's body."

I lead HS to the area, and we throw a bunch of rubble. outta the way until we get inta what was left of Batgirls's old apartment.

"I don't see him anywhere Kon." HS States.

" Hmmm. " I start rubbing my chin. " If I was a loser stalker who couldn't get any Where would I be if I was in the object of my obsession's apartment?"


" I don't know dude You'd have to be pretty perverted to even think Like Zero." HS thinks.

" Eureka!" I shout " The underwear drawer!"

We walk though the corridor and I use TTK Clear away the last of the rubble and melted stuff and lo and behold There is a skeleton in Bad clothes holding a bra in one hand and panties up to his face in the other. What a weirdo.

" Well we found it! on to the burial! Old chum!"


" Why do you do that?" HS asked.

" You've never seen my dad slip caffeine pills in Batman's decaf coffee using his speed have you?" I smile.


" No." Hs Admits.

" Well he talks like that when he's on a caffeine high calling Robin Old Chum And yelling to The Batpoles it's hilarious!"

" Okay Pal. Let's bury this guy and get out of this pit. "

So we bury the body and put up a head stone. I burn " Loser into it with my Heatvision and HS rolls his eyes.



We get back to Titan's tower. And find not only Zero ghost still there, being lame. But Robin hiding behind my entertainment center. With Kara on on my chair looking confused.

" Kara do I even wanna know what's goin' on in here?"

" I just walked up to Robin and said hi. He ran in here and hid."

I shrug." Bat family issues? Hey rob! Whatcha doin?"


" Is that Steph out there?"
He looks worried.


" No Kara." My cousin from Krypton." He comes out and Wonder Girl walks in to the door. " AAh! Steph!'


" Okay. " Cassie shakes her head. " What's with him?"

" I dunno, As you can see I still have the ghost. "

" Life is meaningless." The ghost states.

" Ya aren't even livin!" I shout. " What will it take to get rid of you?"

" I want what you stole from me a night with Cassandra , the other one not the blonde."


" Hey! " Cassie yells. " Why not? Wait what am I saying ? Your weird. I don't care if you like me."


Robin shrieks from under my bed now, Yeah he's gonna have to leave there soon. " You are not touching my little sister emo!" Ya know it's times like this I miss Bart he would enjoy this chaos. I call HS over.

" Okay huddle like in football. He wants Cassie Cain I say we give her to him."

" Dude I am not pimping out my uncle's girlfriend to a dead guy."

"I didn't say your uncle's girlfriend pal.The Cassie Cain he'll be gettin' busy with ain't the one that's in West City Or in Gotham I can't keep up where she is any way it won't be that one."

" I don't follow Conner."

" I'll explain on the way to the Fortress of Solitude. "

Misadventures in ghostbusting part one.

So HS says an angel can help us huh? I know an Angel who used to be on the JLA Zauriel.I jump up and grab him because ya know every time heroes meet we gotta fight first. He zaps me with some magic and I fall.


" Why did you attack me? I'm telling Superman how you treated me! " he flies off.

" Kon, if you wanted him to help us why did you attack?" HS shakes his head.

" It's superhero etiquette first ya fight then ya team up. Someone forgot to tell Zauriel ."

Hs rolls his eyes. " perhaps we should try something else Kon, do you know where Zero's body is?"

I think for a second." No, but i know someone who might. The chick I "stole" from from him Batgirl. "

" Ya know Kon we could have avoided all of this if you didn't do the whole one night stand , love and leave ' em thing."

" Yeah yeah! On to West City faithful Sidekick!"

He sighs. " Do you want me to help you?"

" Sure." I say.

" Then don't call me sidekick."

I smile " Sure old chum!"

" Let's go You know I like you better when you actually sleep."

" Yeah when we get rid of of whiny, I'll stop that."

Ya know what's weird about Team Legacy's House? It ain't that well Superheroish. ya know the X-men ,Avengers, and Batman all live in these mansions. While Legacy just lives in a house. Maybe Nightwing coulda helped them gave them a big giant "L " to live in or something.

Well we knock on the door and it just kinda opens me and HS think evil giant avocado monster or prissy supervillian attack. Nope It was just Gwen leaves the door open when she goes outside.

And we walk into this room to find Stephanie and Cassandra dancing. when Steph dips Cass I yell " Woah! I always knew you two were an item!"

Spoiler gets my hopes up with. "Yes you came in right before we were about shower together, and have a pillow fight in our underwear."

Sweet. Then Cassandra has to destroy my fantasy with. Um.. I love Vincent.. And um.. How would we um.. you don't have a ... "

Then Stephanie answers with. " Cass. Don't worry about it. I'm just messing with these two's tiny boy minds."

I smirk. " You know Cass if your curious I have some DVDs... "


She interrupts me and asks me what I was doing there. " well what can you tell us about Zero?" HS interrupts.

" Bad kisser... " Cass starts with her looking for words thing. . " I was.. younger.. dumb. "

I smile. " Yeah that's why ya spent your first time with me right? I'm a good kisser."

" Yes." My ego soars. " Your just bad at... everything else. " And it plummets to floor , and is beaten to death. " Why do you care about Zero?"

" His ghost is haunting me. " I explain. " And my bud HS says we should try to find his body and bury it. "

Then Cass Starts sobbing. " He's.. at Bludhaven.. With all the others... I couldn't save them.. I left to find my mother. .. " She then wanders sulks off to her cave hideout. I know how it feels when you can't save someone like me failing to save Tana.

So I decide to pretend I wasn't bothered. " Ya know Steph I see why Tim likes ya ." After she lectures me on upsetting Cass then we fly off before Vincent with his supersaiyan jealousy decides to show up. Or Inertia, well if he ever found his way off Bizarro World.

I fly a little further. And HS catches up . " Hey what happened to you bck there? "


" What do ya mean?" I try to avoid the subject.

" I mean after Cass was talking about not being able to save Bludhaven you went all weird."

I sigh. " The first woman I loved was murdered. Ya know after losing evreyone from Spoiler to all her friends at Bludhaven I can see why Cass decided to get one of them back. "

" you want to talk about it?" he asks.

" No not really. " I change the subject. " Rao this is gonna be tough. Finding one body in that crater of the dead Bludhaven has become."


" Well we could try something else. " HS Shrugs.

" Nah. We'd likely end up doin' this anyway . " I grin. " On to Bludhaven Old Chum!"

He shakes his head. " This is going to be a long trip."

Kon: Hey HS..

So HS is angstin' bout his dad being reverted mentally to a seventeen year old.

" And he doesn't.. know mom thinks I'm crazy and worse he keeps trying to go back into his own Universe...."


"Uh huh uh huh..ZZZZZZZZZZZZ. "


" Conner! Hey Conner! Am I boring you? "

" Eh? Wha? Aw no man, It's just that hey ya know magic and stuff right?"

" Yeah a little why?"


I smile. "Sweet maybe ya can help me out with a problem pal."

I take him to Titans' tower, and of course Ravager whistles at him as usual not that it matters.. Because she don't matter. I open up my room. " That. Can ya get rid of it? "


"A crying ghost of some dude?" HS asks.

" Yeah. He constantly whines, cries , and he won't let me sleep. Please can ya do something?"

Robin thinks he has problems with dead?

So Tim Comes in yelling. "The dead are talking to me!"

" Your lucky they are just talking to you." I sigh.

" Huh?" Robin asks.

" They aren't appearing in front of ya, or yellin' at ya are they?"

" Um No." He responds. "Conner Are you feeling okay?"

" Come with me Tim. I lead him to room and show him the annoying ghost that's been haunting me for weeks. "


" You Took Cassandra's Virginity!" " the tattooed loser ghost yelled pointing at me.

" Which one?" I yell.

" hey! I saw this kid in Bludhaven." Robin rubs his chin. " Yeah Your Cass' Ex. the loser.That I wanted to beat up!"


I laugh. "I can see why he is pretty whiny. So the Cass he dated was Cain right? what's this douche's name. "

" Zero." Tim said.

" BWHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHA! Ah jeez the name describes the guy."

The ghost whines at me again. " She made out with me than had sex with you!"

I smile. " Well I ain't a tattooed whiner, And if your ghost is any indication ya didn't take baths in life. And there's one big difference between us dude. "


" Yeah?" the ghost looks up.

" I'm hot dude."

" You wish Conner!" Ravager walks by yelling. " that and your extremely tiny downstairs!"


How many times do I have to tell people this? " It ain't true! Cass lied about that!!!!"

I turn my attention back to loser ghost. " Why ain't ya hauntin' Cass herself or Vincent? I mean I only had the one time with her. "


" Yeah and ya almost turned her off guys small fry!" Ravager chuckles.

" There ain't no way her boyfriend is that much bigger than me!" I yell.

" Your slutty cousin took pictures of him back when they dated. , and yeah he is." Ravager. states.

" Any way. Why are you haunting me?" I ask the ghost again ignoring Ravager.

" Because I was supposed to sleep with her !" Again with the damn whining. " And the saiyan boy ignores me. Or he sleeps with Cass In front of me then he shows off. And finally his sister banished me with a ring. "

" Wow pathetic in life , and worse as a ghost." Tim grins. " Glad i set her up with Vincent. He's a step up from you."

" Fine I'll haunt you Robin."

" After living with Batman a loser ghost isn't going to bother me. " He chuckles "So go for it.

The ghost yells that's it "I'm going to go and cut myself!" He tries to grab A knife I have in room and his hand goes through it Then he huddles in the corner and cries. i throw a whole bunch of blankets over him. Though they go through him after a while piling them means I can't see him. I'll am so calling an exorcist. or I'll get a Green Lantern to Banish him . I wonder If I still have those black mail pics of Guy Gardener?

Kon-EL: Bizarro weddings are teh suck

I have no idea why the heck I went to this bizarro wedding. I mean Superman warned me to avoid it. I should have known right off that things were gonna go bad. The flower girl threw crap on the church floor .

The usher kicked me in the balls. Lucky for me I'm invulnerable, And he didn't have adamntium gloves and years of training. I've gotta stop lettin' people hit me there.

Oh and worse this was the bride.

I started laughing . Man I haven't had a good laugh at all lately with Robin dating Cassie, and Bart dyin' and all. But this was just too hilarious.

" You am not laughing At Match's bride?" Match mumbles.

" Ha! Nah! Think she's too good for you." I chuckle.

Finally Match laughs. " Ha! This am Match's brilliant plan to trap you! Now me beat you!"

Oh cool! A fight. I've been needin' to work off some steam.

Then Inertia shouts " Wait this was all a plan to get into a fight with Superboy? I rented a damn tux!"

" No." match smiles "Am this not brilliant plan?"

" Oh come on!" Thadeus Thawne shouts in disgust " Ya coulda just asked him to step outside. Ya know what I went through ta get a date for this thing? I even went out with Bart's ugly freak of a girlfriend! Just to win some points with her hotter aunt! Damn it!"

" You do want help me fight Superboy?" Match asks.

" No! I mean maybe I would've if ya told me this was the plan but since I went through all this crap for nothing no sprokin' way! Grife! "

match charges me , but it seems he doesn't have a lot of his powers anymore just the same ones I have no invisibility or teleportation or TTK. Just the good ol' Superman powers an' I'm usin' them better since my brain ain't screwed up by bein' a Bizzaro, that and I've been doin' a lot of fight training before and since the tournament I was in.

He was taken down quick, and I leave this stupid planet Guffawing the whole way. Worst supervillian plan ever! Hey I think there's a planet with an awesome alien strip club on it, and the drinkin' age is like 15! Oh this is gonna be sweet!

Meanwhile. Inertia: " Hey wait! Superboy! Come back take me back to Earth! Damn It he can't hear me.. No wait. he has super hearing. That punk is ignorin' me!"

Match: " This is not good. You can no stay on Bizarro World, and be my worst pal for never, and never and..."

Inertia : "AAAAAAH!"

I have some questions

First. Why is Vampirella asleep in my Fortress?

Where are her clothes?

Who put her in here?

How did they get in?

Where are they now?

And what is with the mannequin dressed up like a ninja?

Good news is whoever put her here will come back I hope. And when they do I'll ask them about this. One last question. How do I explain this to Lois?

It's my fault!!

Bart's dead because of me . If I hadn't have upset Joe Fixit. We wouldn't have ended uo hiding in that room, All three of us under a blanket. Or what I like to call creepy time. If I had Just taken my beating like a man, well.. it maybe I could have saved him.


It didn't matter that I escaped the Hulk or not because the commotion of the villains fighting us attracted him anyway. And he knocked me outta the building.

I put up a good fight, I zapped him with heat vision, Blew him up with TTK Then Finally froze him on the ground until i froze him with my breathe .

I thought it was over, until he shatters the ice. I just haul off and pop him one. He falls, and I keep doing it until finally my punches didn't affect him anymore. Then he just laughs. And beats me down.

" Ya know kid. It wouldn't have been so bad if ya didn't run , or scream like a little girl." i just moan, as he leaps off then when I stumble back into the motel room I find that Bart's dead.


I've been thinkin' about every Resurrection thing I know. Called Vella(Who's still pissed at me by the way.) And she said the Dragon balls can only be used once a year, and that still isn't up yet.

Everything else is out, because he's likely in the Speed Force , and not in any after life. Cassandra (Wonder Girl not Batgirl)wanted to talk about her relationship with Robin. Me I didn't even see any point anymore.

I mean I get it, I was dead, For all I know I coulda done it with Spoiler, I have like no memory of the aferlife. That and I ain't been exactly faithful since my return.

Maybe I should go to the Fortress Of Solitude see if there's anything there that can bring Bart back. I mean something there brought Supes back . Who knows? Just hope This place isn't overrun with Inertias from Tim's cloning experiments when I get back.

Kon: Augh!

Tim tricked me. And now I'm sleepin' in a bathtub.what's worse is Bart just keeps remindin' me that Tom And Cassie had somethin' goin' while I was dead. Which is why I don't feel so bad that I broke the knob off the radio in Tim's room, where it's stuck on a country station. He hates Country Music.


It has batteries in it that i used my TTK to fuse into the radio, then I welded it into the floor with heat vision. Heh. Enjoy Tim.

Man sleepin' in a tub sucks. I don't have enough room for my legs I broke the faucet with my head. A while ago. My freeze breathe stopped the Water from splashin' on my face, but now it's drippin' like a Chinese water torture.

Ya know If I was like superman, and only needed 3 or four hours of sleep a day this wouldn't be so bad. Nope I need 8 like evreyone else. Forget this! I'm gonna find some empty room and sleep in it instead of doin' this.


After usin' some X-ray vision I find one across the hall. TTK opens the door for me , and I sleep soundly until this voice wakes me up. " You shouldn't be here."

" Woah!" I shout. " Look Pal. I didn't know this room was occupied, I'll just go on."


" Too late!" He shouts " I was finally keeping him inside my brain at night! Now you went and made ma angry by stealing my room! He's coming out!"


Oh great this guy's a nut. I move past him until he falls on the floor and goes into convulsions. I See if he's OK and he gets up all muscly, Not only that but his skin is grey and he's a lot taller than he used to be.


Ya know I once worked with Joe Fixit, Actually he black mailed me. But I didn't know he turned into a little dude. Then I put two , and two together, Little dude turns into a big dude with super strength. "Fixit? your the Hulk ain't ya?"
I ask.



" Yup. An' I'm real grateful that ya let me outta banner's head, But ya still gotta pay fer messin' up my room. So I think a small beatin' oughta cover it. "


"AAAAHHHHH!" is the only thing I can get out before I start running " Tim! Bart! We gotta get outta here now!"